Hello readers I’ve noticed that the response from 1st Chap to 3rd has decreased? Are you’ll not liking the story? Or something else so tell me otherwise I don’t think I’ll update on time because then I’ll not have that enthusiasm to write so tell me if you’ll want me to stop. This is because I want your sympathy, this is just to inform you’ll that for writing I want good response. Silent readers please break your silence.
What just happened to him? Why did he say that? Why are you forgetting Swara, you know that he’s a jerk and he’ll say anything but he’s a little nice jerk. Are you mad Swara? A nice jerk? Like seriously you’re going mad.
I should forget about this disaster named Sanskar, I don’t know I feel I’ve some connection with him but what? I don’t get that but I need to know. I think I’m just over thinking about him I should get some sleep.
When I went towards my bed, yesterday’s dream stopped me. My hands started shivering. I’d to consult Dr Laksh, he told me to take medicines for these panic attacks but I didn’t listen to him. I need to visit him, his clinic must be open right now.
I rushed, took my keys and drove to his clinic.
“Miss Swara you should not take stress. You should forget about your past. Look I don’t know what has happened to you but you should take care about yourself. Don’t take much stress it affects you” Doctor said
“Doctor I try not to take stress but I can’t help it”
He sighed and said “I’m prescribing some medicines for you. I can’t assure that the panic attacks will stop but they will reduce”
I thanked him and left his clinic. As I was moving towards my car I spotted Ragini looking at me with her hands crossed in front of her chest and she had an annoyed look at her face.
“Hey what happened? Did you broke up with someone?” I asked trying to lighten the mood because by seeing her expression I was sure she was about to burst.
“Shona tell me how many fingers can you see?” She asked me showing four fingers.
“Are you insane? What happened Ragu?”
“Shut up and tell me” she looked quite angry.
“I see four fingers done?”
Suddenly she grinned “That means you’re not blind” then she frowned “then why didn’t you see me at your office? You walked past me, I called you also but you didn’t stop”
Why did she remind me again about office? Whenever I thought about office Sanskar came in my mind and I actually just wanted to ignore him.
“Oh! I didn’t see you” I said trying to be casual in front of her.
“By the way how did you come to know that I was at the clinic?” I asked changing the topic.
“By seeing your face at the office, I was 100% sure that either you would be at home thinking something or you would be at the clinic finally giving up and taking medicines” she knew me so well.
I smiled at her “Now let’s get in the car, we’re getting late” I said and continued “and tell your mom that you’re having dinner at my house today, give your car keys to driver and tell him to go home and you come with me.”
“No I’m not going with you.”
“Why?” I asked her, I was amused she was refusing for the first time.
“Shona don’t you remember I’m still angry at you” she said pouting. She was truly my little sister, the way she always got angry on me for no reason and then I would always run behind her for forgiveness. She still didn’t change.
“Ragu, can we continue this at my home?” She agreed and sat in the car. She was a great actress, I knew she wasn’t angry but still she’ll not accept till I give her a box of chocolates.
“Auntie! The food is so delicious” Ragini exclaimed. I rolled my eyes as always her buttering had started. My mother smiled and said “Actually I’ve not made the dinner today as I was not feeling well…..”
“Mom are you OK?” I asked cutting her off.
She smiled at me”Shona I’m fine, no need to worry and Ragini I didn’t make the dinner, Mary made it”
Ragini’s mouth was hung to the floor as her plan backfired I looked at her and smirked. She glared at me and turned towards my mom “But auntie if you would have made the dinner it would be more delicious, by the way Aunt Mary! Dinner is awesome” she said. My mother smiled at her. She always knew how to butter people.
She was chatting with my mother during the dinner. I kept quiet, I didn’t like to talk so much. I still wonder why is she my best friend? She’s totally opposite to me. She’s lively, she’s always happy, she loves to talk, she makes everyone happy around her on the other hand it’s me I’m always dull, I’m always sad or stressed, I don’t like to talk, people around me are scared of me, they fear coming in contact with me. But still I’m happy that even after whatever happened in my life, she has always supported me. She has seen me from childhood. Our mothers were good friends but as that man always used to abuse me, I started staying dull and stayed quiet, but still she supported me and because of her only today I’ve been able to do great success in business. She helped a lot in my struggle.
I was thinking all this sitting on my bed when someone suddenly started shaking me. I looked up and saw her.
“What happened Ragu? You sleep I’ll sleep afterwards, I’ve some office work.” I didn’t want her to know that I still took sleeping pills.
She put her hands on her waist and asked me “Am I looking like a small kid to you? Shona don’t argue and sleep. It’s already so late and I’m feeling sleepy” she said yawning.
“So sleep. I told you I’ve some work” I said going towards my study.
“Shona please please please please please!!!!” She said closing her eyes and joining her hands. I shook my head in disbelief at her childish nature.
“Ok fine but please bring my blanket from the cupboard” I said so I could take my sleeping pills without her noticing me. She hugged me and ran on the other side, as soon as she went I took out my pills, ate them and drank water. As I turned I was shocked to see her staring at me broken.
I couldn’t believe what I saw. Shona still took sleeping pills, she told me that she stopped taking them but she still took them. I was sad that she lied to me. I didn’t expect that she would hide such a big thing from me.
“You still take them?” I asked her in disbelief. She nodded her head in approval. I caught her from shoulders and jerked her.
“Shona just look around what you’re doing to your loved ones. Just look at your mom, look at me. We’ve always wanted your good but why did you lie to us? You know right that taking them for such a long time can cause your life, did you even think once about auntie? How will she live without you? Shona please stop harming yourself and the people who love you.” I was very angry on her
“Then what should I do? Everyday I’m dying with that guilt. I took his life Ragu. If there really exists something like God, then why did he take him away when he didn’t wanted to die and now when I want to die he’s not taking my life. Why?” I could see the tears in her eyes. She was completely broken by his death. 5 years had passed but still she wasn’t able to forget that incident.
“Shona, maybe you still have something left to complete in your life.” I tried comforting her.
She jerked me and said “No! No one in this world cares about me, not even your God. Look everyday, he gives me that pain which is unbearable but I still bear it because I can’t leave my mom in this state. But at least let me do this.”
“Shona you’re not understanding, by taking these pills you’re dying”
“When was I alive Ragu?” She asked me with an emotionless face, only tears were rolling down her eyes but her face was showing no emotion.
“Shona you’re not fine, please have sleep” I made her sleep on the bed while she still had that emotionless face with uncontrollable tears rolling down her eyes. I kept stroking her hair and forehead soon she was relaxed and slept with the effect of the pills. I had to do something, fast.
Here I was in the club drinking with Laksh and Rohan. They both were commenting and flirting with girls while was still trying to be the old Sanskar I was. I had to do this, I had to take her out of my mind before she controls me. Every time I tried to flirt with anyone her face came in my mind and I backed off. My friends were really pissed off with my behavior. Since Laksh arrived late Rohan came to know about my problem.
“Hey dude what happened today, where’s your charm today? Where’s that Sanskar I used to see a month ago? Since you’ve joined you’ve changed” Laksh told.
Rohan said “Dude you don’t know? A girl has done a magic on him and guess what she’s the same girl he was talking a week ago” he was telling as if I’ve already fallen in love with Swara.
Laksh widened his eyes and asked me in utter disbelief “Your boss?” I nodded but still didn’t look at them but then he asked “by the way who is she?”
Before I could say Rohan said “She’s some Swara Rajvanshi” David looked at me, his mouth was hung to the floor. He said “Sanskar don’t tell me that she’s the same Swara Rajvanshi who’s the owner of SRS Industries?”
I looked at him with a confused face and asked “Why what happened?”
He said “Dude Swara Rajvanshi is my patient, I treat her”
“What!!” I shouted.
So how was it? Swara is still getting panic attacks. She lied to Ragini about not taking sleeping pills.
Why is Swara guilty? Why does she feel that she’s responsible for someone’s death?
Laksh is Swara’s doctor as well as Sanskar’s friend. What will be Sanskar’s reaction when he’ll get to know about Swara’s panic attacks?
Keep reading for the answers?
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- Broken souls : a swasan ff chspter 3
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